Voting ‘Yes’ On A Constitutional Convention

This commentary originally appeared in the The Post Journal on Oct 15, 2017

From all of the press reports and lawn signs I have been seeing, I may be the only person in Chautauqua County voting in favor of having a Constitutional Convention.

The leaders of both the Democratic and Republican majorities in the state legislature are against it. The Governor is quietly opposed (or seems to be.) The public employee unions are opposed. Most of the lobbyists in Albany are opposed.

Upstate thinks it will be over-powered by downstate. Downstate worries that Upstate will try and secede from the State. Environmentalists are opposed because they think that bad things could happen. Business interests are worried that environmentalists will cause havoc and shut down industry.

In my view, the organized voice to vote “No” on having a Constitutional Convention by most of the entrenched interests in Albany… is probably a good reason to vote “Yes.” A “No” vote is essentially a vote to keep doing business the same old way. The kind of structural reforms that are needed to address the dysfunction and bad habits of state government will not be addressed by those who would be affected by them. The only way that citizens of the State can be assured that reforms will be made is by voting to amend the Constitution.

The vote coming up in November is just the beginning of a process. If approved by voters, a Constitutional Convention would be convened in 2018. Any recommended changes by such a Convention are required to be submitted to the voters in 2019 for approval. The Convention itself does not have the power to amend the Constitution.

In my view, Constitutional changes are the only way to address the governance problems in Albany. For example, do you think that the Governor would ever support limiting the terms of his/her service to 2 terms (8 years) similar to our Federal Constitution? Do you think that the Speaker of the Assembly or Majority Leader of the State Senate would ever propose limiting their tenure as leader to 10 years, as has been done in some other states?

The problems (and criminal indictments) that come from keeping the same people at the top jobs in perpetuity in Albany can only be changed if voters change the State’s Constitution.

I am not surprised that the entrenched interests in Albany want to stay “entrenched” and want you to vote “No” on the November 7th ballot.

Though it may be futile in a low turnout election as predicted for this year and defeat seems likely … I am still going to cast a “Yes” vote to have a Constitutional Convention. The only way we are going to clean up Albany is to put limits on the current power structure. Hoping that the legislature and Governor will solve this problem is not a solution. They will never vote to limit their power and authority. I know, I was there once.


Rolland Kidder

Rolland Kidder is a Stow resident and former member of the New York state Assembly.

A Third Party?

This commentary originally appeared in the The Post-Journal on Oct 1, 2017

There has been more talk recently about a third political party emerging out of the chaos we see going on in Washington. A lot of people, whom I would call “common sense” Republicans and Democrats, have been talking about it. Why shouldn’t they?

For example, for some Republicans it gets tiresome to have to try and defend a plan to spend billions on a new wall along the U.S./Mexican border. They still remember President Ronald Reagan’s “tear down this Wall” speech which he made in Berlin in 1987.

On a totally different issue, many Democrats cringe when they turn on their natural gas furnace in the winter because the official “line” of their party keeps putting up obstacles to natural gas development. In places like New York State its production has essentially been banned and it is next to impossible to build a natural gas pipeline.

What is going on here is that in the Republican Party, the right wing is calling the shots on foreign policy: “Build the Wall!” On the other hand, in the Democratic Party the left wing is calling the shots on energy policy: “Ban all fossil fuels!” Most middle-of-the road Americans see things exactly the opposite. They “Oppose the wall!” and “Support natural gas!”…maybe these “middle Americans” should organize themselves into a new political party that more realistically represents their views.

"If there were such a political party, I might join it"

If there were such a political party, I might join it. The Democratic position on energy (and especially natural gas) is totally disingenuous. Natural gas is the cleanest and most cost effective way to heat a house. The new ways of drilling and completing natural gas wells are environmentally safer than the old ways, natural gas is produced domestically (not dependent on the Middle East) and the energy is needed to back up and provide firm service for the new, but interruptible, forms of energy like solar and wind. Being against natural gas? How could the Democratic Party be so wrong on such a common sense issue?

In a similar way, the Republican right-wing position on building a Mexican wall is equally as crazy. Don’t people understand that airplanes fly over walls? Afghanistan has always been one of the prime sources of opiate production. Our military now essentially controls the country. Has anyone been suggesting that we build a wall around Afghanistan to stop illegal drug exports to the U.S.? In the end, the Great Wall of China failed to keep out the Mongols, but at least it was an architectural marvel which became a tourist attraction. Building “walls” doesn’t answer anything.

So, if I am opposed to wall building as a basis for foreign policy and support natural gas development as an energy policy… maybe I should be looking for a new political party. Maybe it could be called the “Americans United Party.” It would try to solve common problems by people pulling together on the same oar. (Think of national unity during World War II.)

Of course, pragmatically, it is next to impossible to form a new political party. (Remember Ross Perot?) All the states have Boards of Elections essentially controlled by the Republican and Democratic parties. So I am not sure how it could be done. Yet, I do believe there is growing public support for a return to common sense politics which address the primary concerns of voters and are not dominated by the views of fringe groups which now drive the policies of the existing major political parties.


Rolland Kidder, 
Stow, NY

The New Politics of Washington

This commentary originally appeared in the The Post-Journal on Sep 24, 2017

Whether you like Donald Trump or don’t, it seems apparent now that he is operating on a different wave-length at least when it comes to partisan politics. On paper, his party controls both houses of the federal legislature, yet he recently signed off on a deal to keep government running with Democratic support. What gives?

President Trump is essentially a transactional person.   He is not much driven by ideology.

In my opinion, President Trump is essentially a transactional person. He is not much driven by ideology. He wants to do things, and he also wants to be at the center of whatever that is. If “X” doesn’t work, he will try “Y.”

If casinos in New Jersey no longer work, let’s try building hotels overseas. If the Republicans on Capitol Hill can’t deliver on a vote (like repealing Obamacare,) then let’s see what the Democrats have to offer.

In a counter-intuitive kind of way, maybe we are finding a way forward for this Presidency. The White House will make a proposal today, and a “tweet” might reverse it tomorrow. Yet, if what ultimately gets done, requires the consent of both major political parties on Capitol Hill… maybe the country can move forward.

What is clear is that President Trump is beginning to realize that running the Executive branch of the federal government is a lot different from running a multi-million dollar private corporation. You can’t just lay down an edict which everyone will agree to. You have to find consensus which means compromise and vote-counting.

Some Democrats may find fault with Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer for his willingness to deal with this President. Yet, I find it laudable that our Senator is able to put aside some basic disagreements and try to find common ground upon which to run the government.

Even a person who doesn’t like government still doesn’t want it shut down. People want their social security checks, their healthcare, and definitely want a strong military protecting them.

Where is all of this going? It is still too early to tell but I think it is fair to say that our current President does not want the government to shut down on his watch.

Those of us who are essentially “observers” in all of this watch in amazement. Congressional investigations continue to go on, changes keep happening at the White House, sometimes it is hard to know who is on first, second or third base. Nevertheless, it is not boring.

One other “unknown” has, in my opinion, become a stabilizing force in our politics… and that is the impact of Hurricanes Harvey and now Irma.

In a “backdoor” kind of way, these tragic weather events have become a common experience in unifying the country. We all need each other and want to help each other.

Keeping the government running never seemed to be a priority, it was a given. It is clear that it is not something we can take for granted any longer; and, for now, it has become the catalyst for action on Capitol Hill. 

Rolland Kidder

Rolland Kidder is a Stow resident.

Spring Starts with the Masters

Frank Deford, NPR, April 5, 2017

Amen Corner at Augusta, where treachery and beauty blend together as well as any James Bond villainess

In days of yore, Opening Day of the baseball season was special, signifying that spring had come at last.

Today, however, Opening Day sort of dribbles into existence, and the spiritual start of spring now belongs to the Masters golf tournament, where the azaleas and magnolias and dogwood bloom. And if they dare look like they're gonna bloom too soon, in March the groundskeepers are rumored to pack them with ice to make sure spring comes as God intended it, which this year is on Thursday.

By now, in fact, the Masters course is a federal treasure, to sports what Old Faithful is to the National Park Service. And once again it is peaceful at Augusta National Golf Club, after some rather ugly stand-offs in recent years, when the club balked at changing its all-white, all-male membership tradition. African-Americans and female Americans are on the club manifest now along with other golf-Americans, and all is serene once again.

Yes, some people do find the Masters too snooty and the closing ceremony is so painfully precious that even the man who for years himself produced the coronation admitted that it was "the worst thing in the world." But I'm being picayune. The Masters is otherwise a thing of efficient beauty.

Start with the name.  Masters sounds almost too elegant to be American. 

And when it comes to names? There are really only two discrete pieces of official U.S. sports real estate which are familiarly known by a title. One is a huge ugly slab, but besides that Green Monster at Fenway Park, there is only Amen Corner on the back nine at Augusta, where treachery and beauty blend together as well as any James Bond villainess.

Even the fans, who must be called "patrons," are more polite and litter-conscious than at other sporting venues. The Masters is not greedy. You wanna buy a Masters souvenir logo shirt? Sure, let's go over to the nearest Ralph Lauren boutique. Oops, you can only purchase Masters memorabilia at the Masters, this one week of the year. And most meaningful of all to patrons watching at home, the tournament has fewer commercials than other sports events.

Well, yes, the Masters is too stylish to be an American icon. It's as out of character for Uncle Sam as a McDonald's is for France. But hush now and stay behind the ropes. Spring begins on Thursday.

A New Governing Coalition

Published April 2, 2017 in The Jamestown Post-Journal

If you are my age, you probably remember the great old western movie “High Noon.” The Marshall (Gary Cooper) of a frontier town meets a gun-slinger and his outlaw gang at noon in a shoot-out. It is a tense, decisive moment.

On a recent Friday, it was “high noon” in the halls of Congress as the time approached for a decisive vote on the repeal and replacement of Obamacare. But then, it didn’t happen. The votes weren’t there. “High noon” was a fizzle.

I am sure many in our community were watching since in the midst of all the legal language in the bill was a provision that would have prohibited New York state’s current mandate of requiring that a significant portion of Medicaid costs be paid by counties. Since 50% of our local county property tax bill goes to Medicaid, this could have ended up being a tremendous benefit to local tax payers.

However, that provision, along with everything else being proposed never saw the light of day. Action on the repeal of Obamacare was called off, and I doubt will be tried again in this current Congress.

What the blow-up in repealing Obamacare highlighted was the continuing story we have seen since John Boehner was Speaker of the House of Representatives. There really is no true governing majority in the Republican Party in the House when it comes to tough issues.

It appears likely that we are entering a time of national political gridlock where very little is going to get done.

The same kind of impasse is likely to be seen again in upcoming tough votes like extending the national debt limit or passing another budget. It appears likely that we are entering a time of national political gridlock where very little is going to get done.

Let’s hope it doesn’t result again in a shutting down of the government.

What it means for our new President is that he is going to have to try and cobble together a coalition which can govern. The “Art of the Deal” is now going to be more difficult. Somehow a coalition of Republicans and Democrats will need to be formed in the House of Representatives so that the governing of this great nation can continue to happen.

One idea might be to look at what the Republicans in New York state have done in the State Senate.

They have agreed to work with a splinter group of Democrats (who call themselves the “Independent Democratic Coalition”) to cooperate on major legislation and in putting together the annual state budget. So far this effort of bi-partisanship in Albany has been productive.

Are the Republicans in the House of Representatives in Washington ready to embrace such an idea? Is there a group of independent minded Democrats who will break with their established ranks to do this?

The lesson being learned again in Washington is that it is a lot easier to get elected than it is to govern. Yet, good governance is actually what the people need and want. What we are going to find out in the coming months is whether the Congress is capable of doing it.


Rolland Kidder
Stow, NY

Two Options for Public Service

Published March 26, 2017 in The Jamestown Post-Journal

Most people, I believe, support the idea that public service is a good thing. It may have fallen out of favor recently as we have started “draining the swamp” in Washington. Nevertheless, I am confident that most Americans still rally around the idea that public (government) service and good public servants help us all.

As an example, we have two public organizations in Chautauqua County which require leadership. One employs a CEO who is paid approximately $160,000 a year, has an employment contract, a good benefit package, supervises 158 employees, has a regular work week and administers a $25.5 million budget. The other organization has a CEO with no employment contract, who makes $95,000 per year, administers a $273 million budget, supervises 1200 employees and works a regular work week plus is required to attend virtually non-stop evening and week-end meetings/events with constituents.

If one of your children were seeking employment and wanted a CEO position in the public sector in our area… which job would you recommend they take? I would imagine that for most people it would be a “no-brainer.” You would recommend the job with higher pay, fewer employees, a smaller budget and more free time.

So what does this boil down to in Chautauqua County? In this particular case, it would mean that you would recommend the position of Superintendent of the Southwestern Central School system vs. that of becoming the County Executive as being the best employment option for one of your kids. As a matter of fact, it might even evoke the thought of “who in their right mind” would even want to be the Chief Executive of Chautauqua County?

Who in their right mind would even want to be Chief Executive of Chautauqua County?

This all, of course, is becoming relevant because our current County Executive, Vince Horrigan, has announced that he is not running for re-election. Most of us, I believe, feel fortunate that Mr. Horrigan has been our county leader for the past four years. He is a retired Air Force Officer who has worked hard on our behalf to stabilize county finances, encourage investment in sewer and water infrastructure, and promote job growth in the county. But the larger question is: how long are we going to be able to find good people to run for this job?  Something is out-of-kilter in how we value this leadership position.

Years ago, I was involved in the decision to create a County Charter form of government with an elected County Executive. We debated having the Executive be an appointed official but thought, at the time, that accountability to the voters should be the over-riding concern… and the voters approved direct election of the Executive in adopting the County Charter. However, I am having second thoughts now about that decision.

Something is out-of-kilter in how we value this leadership position.

Maybe the County should implement a structure more aligned to that in the private sector. You could have a Board of Directors (the legislature) who are responsible to the Shareholders (the voters), and the Board would appoint a CEO (the County Executive) to run the day-to-day affairs of the County. At least, it seems to me, this system might be more appealing to those who want to commit to being a CEO in a position of public service. It shouldn’t be that the position of School Superintendent (of which there are 17 in Chautauqua County) should be so much more appealing than that of the County Executive who is responsible for the largest portion of our non-school, governmental functions.


Rolland Kidder
Stow, NY

Electoral College Is Our System

Published January 1st, 2017 in The Jamestown Post-Journal

There are two issues that have surfaced since the election: one which, in my mind, should cause some real concern. The other should be forgotten and left behind.

The “real” issue is whether and to what extent the election was influenced by a foreign power(s) through hacking on the internet and abuse of the electronic media. The name most mentioned is Russia, but the issue goes beyond one country. If our elections can be interfered with or corrupted by any foreign power… it is a matter that should concern us all. Both Democrats and Republicans in the Congress have expressed concern about this, and hopefully, can they can get to the bottom of it.

The other issue which has received a lot of “buzz” is the matter of the Electoral College. Since Hillary Clinton won the popular vote by over 2 million votes, there are a lot of voices calling for the direct election of the President. To that, an old cliche is probably the best advice: “Don’t waste your time, forget about it!” The Electoral College is a part of the U.S. Constitution and it is not going to change.

Back in college I read James Madison’s Journals of the Constitutional Convention. What came out in those journals is that the Constitution was created through a series of compromises. The agricultural states were concerned about the influence of the commercial/industrial states. Small states wanted protection against bigger states. And, there was an underlying concern about the wisdom of the populace in directly electing the President. The creation of the Electoral College was one of the compromises made to address these concerns.

So think about our politics today. Nothing much has really changed. The small states still want protection from the bigger states, and smaller states benefit by getting leverage through the Electoral College. Agricultural states, like Iowa, still worry about the overpowering influence of large populated, commercial states like California and New York. Southern states still resent the financial power of northern states, etc. The beat goes on!

Since the Constitution requires a vote of three-fourths of the states to amend the Constitution, what are the chances that smaller states in the union would ever approve an amendment diminishing their power by eliminating the Electoral College? I would say slim to none. If you lived in the Dakotas, Rhode Island or Wyoming would you vote for such an amendment? Probably not. 

If you lived in the Dakotas, Rhode Island or Wyoming would you vote for such an amendment?  Probably not. 

So we have to move on. This year the Electoral College benefitted the Republican candidate. Next time it could benefit the Democratic candidate. What we do know is that everyone running for President knows the rules. Not only do you need to win the election, you need to carry a certain number of states in order to secure your victory in the Electoral College. Usually, the popular vote winner also wins the vote in the Electoral College — but not this year.

It is not a perfect system, and it may seem undemocratic and unreasonable to people from other countries. However, it is our system. It has been our system since the founding of the union, and it is doubtful we would have had a union without it. It will continue to be the system used in our national elections for the Presidency of our country. Forget about trying to change it.


Rolland Kidder

Mr. Kidder is a Stow resident.

The Dedication of Eldon W. Tozer Square

It was an honor for me recently to participate in the last dedication ceremony for Natick, Mass. residents who were killed in the Vietnam War. In a noon-time ceremony, the name of Eldon W. Tozer became a part of the “Natick 11” who gave their lives serving in Vietnam. A sign was unveiled at the corner of Marion St. and Lincoln Place, now called “Eldon W. Tozer Memorial Square.” 

Though he is buried in Cullen’s Brook, Quebec and was a Canadian, Eldon joined the U.S. Navy while living with his sister and working in Natick. In a sense, he is an “adopted son” of the Natick community. It was moving and powerful for them to honor him in this way.

Jim Tucceri unveils the sign designating “Eldon W. Tozer Square.”

Jim Tucceri, Eldon’s nephew, participated in the ceremony by unveiling the sign designating the new Eldon W. Tozer Square. The home where Jim grew up and where Eldon lived is just four houses down the street from where the sign is located. Resolutions passed by both the House and the State Senate of Massachusetts were presented to Jim (representing the Tozer family,) as was a letter from the Province of Quebec. Special thanks go to Paul Carew (Veterans Agent of Natick), Maureen Sullivan, (Co-coordinator of Natick Veterans Oral History Project), and Josh Ostroff (Natick Board of Selectman) for their leadership in organizing the event.

I read into the record a statement with a strong personal touch which was sent to me by the sister of Eldon Tozer, Frances Tozer Gregoire:

“I was nine years old when he was born. I thought he was sent from Heaven. He was born at home at night, and I heard his first cry. 

I helped take care of him because I was the oldest girl. He was always quiet and very interested in nature. When he was young, he enjoyed watching bugs and spiders. He loved the little things in life. 

During his late teen years, he lived with me, my husband and our children. 

I don’t remember how old he was when he moved to Natick to be with my sister Mona. He worked in a baseball factory there before he joined the Navy. He never gave up his Canadian citizenship. I looked forward to his visits back home.”

It was cold and overcast the day of the ceremony, but I am sure that everyone present was warmed by the beauty and simplicity of the occasion. Local and state representatives were there, a Sargent-Major from a U.S. Army base was present, and an honor guard of veterans with a firing squad provided military honors. Eldon Tozer would have been pleased that he was being remembered by a caring community which has never forgotten him or the sacrifice that he made while serving with the Armed Forces of the United States of America.

Rolland Kidder

Jim Tucceri, Eldon’s Nephew, and author.

Jim Tucceri standing in front the house he grew up in, and where 
Eldon Tozer lived before he joined the U.S. Navy in 1957.

Official letter from the Quebec Consul - read at the dedication by
Josh Ostroff, Natick Board of Selectmen

Memorial Day Brings Poignant Memories For Veterans

Editorial from the Jamestown Post-Journal, May 24 2015

The Florence American Cemetery is pictured in the background. Pictured above, clockwise from left, Mike Lamancuso, foreground, with three friends in Italy in 1944; LaMancuso, a World War II combat infantryman, at his home; the gravesite of a soldier from the 361st Regiment, 91st Infantry Division, Elson Behnke, who was killed on Oct. 9, 1944.

by ROLLAND E. KIDDER

editorial@post-journal.com

There can be poignant memories for military veterans when it comes to Memorial Day. Their remembrances are often specific, filled with names of those they knew who didn’t come home. So it is for Mike LaMancuso, a World War II combat infantryman. It is a day he remembers his buddies who didn’t come back from the fighting in Italy.

Mike was wounded on Friday, Oct. 13, 1944, hit in the leg by a bullet from a German sniper. Four days earlier, on Oct. 9, another soldier from the 361st Regiment, 91st Infantry Division, Elson Behnke, wasn’t as “lucky.” He was killed in the same area. Two young American soldiers, far from home, one wounded, one killed, linked together by an American Army Division fighting to liberate another country. Mike made it home. Elson Behnke is buried at the Florence American Cemetery, near the battlefield where he fell. Though they hadn’t personally met, it is men like Elson Behnke that Mike LaMancuso thinks about on Memorial Day.

Mike has been back to Livergnano, Italy, where he was hit on a Friday the 13th that he will never forget. At the time, Mike’s outfit had been in ferocious combat with the Germans along what was called the “Gothic Line,” Germany’s last major defensive line in the mountains north of Florence. It was the same general area from which two future U.S. Senators, Bob Dole and Dan Inouye, would be medevac’d because of their wounds.

The way Mike describes it: “I could speak Italian, but most of the GI’s couldn’t, so they called the place I was wounded ‘Liver and Onions.’ We had gotten ahead of our lines and were pretty much surrounded by the Germans. We had taken cover behind a house, but were still exposed to enemy fire, and a German sniper shot me in the leg, breaking it in two places. Our unit had to wait until dark before they could get me back to a battalion aid station for treatment.”

Today, over 70 years later, it is hard to believe that the beautiful, pristine countryside near Florence could have been a killing field. But the cemetery reminds you — 4,398 headstones and 1,409 names on the Wall of the Missing, mark the struggle and are a testament to the sacrifice and bravery of American soldiers during the Second World War.

Most Americans who travel to Italy want to visit Florence to see the incredible art and architecture of the Italian Renaissance. While there, they should also take the 20-minute trip southwest toward Siena to experience the silence and awe of the Florence American Cemetery. It makes you proud and humbled to be an American. It is an especially powerful visit on Memorial Day, when there are American and Italian flags flying at each grave marker on this sacred ground.

Another way to remember Memorial Day, if you are celebrating it here at home, would be to stop and thank Mike LaMancuso and those like him who 70 years ago were fighting for values Americans deeply believe in, in far off places like Livergnano (“Liver and Onions”), Italy.

Rolland Kidder is a commissioner of the American Battle Monuments Commission, which is responsible for the care and maintenance of 25 overseas American military cemeteries.

Live Audio from an OV-10 Bronco "Black Pony" air strike

Excerpted from Backtracking in Brown Water, by Rolland E. Kidder

A U.S. Navy Rockwell OV-10A Bronco of light attack squadron VAL-4 Black Ponies attacking a 

target with a 12.7 cm (5 in) "Zuni" rocket in the Mekong Delta, South Vietnam, ca. 1969/70. 

00:15  /  The first part of this tape is a re-recording of an OV-10 Bronco air strike on the Vinh Te Canal.  I am listening to and recording the events of a previous night when a PBR boat captain had recorded the sounds of this air strike.   He and I are laughing and commenting on what occurred.   At one point, a siren goes off, the signal to stop firing.  Then a Vietnamese sailor yells at a local outpost for them to cease firing.  The outpost had been firing mortars into an area where these Navy strike aircraft (with the call sign “Black Pony”) were flying.   From the tape, you can hear metal falling on the deck of the PBR as the machine guns are fired.   Tracers from PBR machine guns were often used to support air strikes by marking the location of enemy positions.  The sound of the twin engine OV-10’s can be heard as they fly low over the boat on their strafing runs toward the target.

04:15 / On October 26, 1969, I tape-recorded the radio traffic during an enemy attack against our heavy River Assault Group boats.  The position of our PBR was about a mile from the encounter.  We could see the firefight in the distance.  The call sign for the RAG boat commander was “Brass Rail”, and individual boats under attack are designated by various letters of the phonetic alphabet.  U.S. Navy Seawolf helicopters and fixed wing Black Pony attack aircraft can also be heard calling in.  A RAG boat radio sometimes remains keyed in the “on” position and you can hear yelling and firing in the background. The tape accurately describes the chaos, anxiety and fear experienced in a firefight.  


AUTHOR'S NOTE:
Since publishing Backtracking in Brown Water, I continue to receive inquiries about this firefight audio link found on page 130.  The QR code provides readers with a direct link to audio files I submitted to the Internet Archive, a non-profit digital library dedicated to preserving artifacts of culture & heritage.

The recording itself came from a tape recorder that I had taken on one of the multi-day patrols on the Vinh Te Canal. (It was one of those small, cassette tape recorders that I had purchased in a Navy PX someplace.) While in Vietnam, I periodically sent tapes home to friends and family instead of writing a letter. On this occasion, I used it to actually record some of the "goings on" on the Vinh Te Canal. The first vignette includes some background discussion between myself and a boat captain of an airstrike he had recorded a prior night. The second occurs on another night when I turned the recorder on during a firefight between the enemy and the RAG boats.  

Fortunately, when I got back to the YRBM 20 after this patrol, I made some copies of the tape. One of them got to an Admiral who queried Mike Connolly about it (see page 125). 

Return to the Mekong Delta

This map traces my journey back to South Vietnam which inspired Backtracking in Brown Water

I Was Just There Last Night

Submitted by Bill Sayers, 9th ID 3rd/60th 

This story came to me anonymously via e-mail, the author, a fellow Vietnam Veteran. After reading his story, I felt compelled to share this with you. If you didn't participate in the Vietnam War, this will give you some insight into how our minds work. He writes: A couple of years ago someone asked me if I still thought about Vietnam. I nearly laughed in their face. How do you stop thinking about it? Every day for the past forty years, I wake up with it- I go to bed with it. This was my response:

"Yeah, I think about it. I can't stop thinking about it. I never will. But, I've also learned to live with it. I'm comfortable with the memories. I've learned to stop trying to forget and learned to embrace it. It just doesn't scare me anymore."

A lot of my "brothers" haven't been so lucky. For them the memories are too painful, their sense of loss too great. My sister told me of a friend she has whose husband was in the Nam. She asks this guy when he was there. Here's what he said, "Just last night." It took my sister a while to figure out what he was talking about. Just Last Night. Yeah, I was in the Nam. When? Just last night, before I went to sleep, on my way to work this morning, and over my lunch hour. Yeah, I was there

My sister says I'm not the same brother who went to Vietnam. My wife says I won't let people get close to me, not even her. They are probably both right. Ask a vet about making friends in Nam. It was risky. Why? Because we were in the business of death, and death was with us all the time. It wasn't the death of, "If I die before I wake." This was the real thing. The kind boys scream for their mothers. The kind that lingers in your mind and becomes more real each time you cheat it. You don't want to make a lot of friends when the possibility of dying is that real, that close. When you do, friends become a liability.

A guy named Bob Flanigan was my friend. Bob Flanigan is dead. I put him in a body bag one sunny day, April 29, 1969. We'd been talking, only a few minutes before he was shot, about what we were going to do when we got back to the world. Now, this was a guy who had come in country the same time as me. A guy who was loveable and generous. He had blue eyes and sandy blond hair. When he talked, it was with a soft drawl. I loved this guy like the brother I never had. But, I screwed up. I got too close to him. I broke one of the unwritten rules of war.  DON'T GET CLOSE TO PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO DIE. You hear vets use the term "buddy" when they refer to a guy they spent the war with. "Me and this buddy of mine."

Friend sounds too intimate, doesn't it? "Friend" calls up images of being close. If he's a friend, then you are going to be hurt if he dies, and war hurts enough without adding to the pain. Get close; get hurt. It's as simple as that. In war you learn to keep people at that distance my wife talks about. You become good at it, that forty years after the war, you still do it without thinking. You won't allow yourself to be vulnerable again.

My wife knows two people who can get into the soft spots inside me-my daughters. I know it bothers her that they can do this. It's not that I don't love my wife. I do. She's put up with a lot from me. She'll tell you that when she signed for better or worse, she had no idea there was going to be so much of the latter. But with my daughters it's different. My girls are mine. They'll always be my kids. Not marriage, not distance, not even death can change that. They are something on this earth that can never be taken away from me. I belong to them. Nothing can change that. I can have an ex-wife; but my girls can never have an ex-father. There's the difference. I can still see the faces, though they all seem to have the same eyes. When I think of us, I always see a line of "dirty grunts" sitting on a paddy dike. We're caught in the first gray silver between darkness and light. That first moment when we know we've survived another night, and the business of staying alive for one more day is about to begin. There was so much hope in that brief space of time. It's what we used to pray for. "One more day, God. One more day."

And I can hear our conversations as if they'd only just been spoken I still hear the way we sounded. The hard cynical jokes, our morbid senses of humor. We were scared to death of dying, and tried our best not to show it.

I recall the smells, too. Like the way cordite hangs on the air after a fire-fight. Or the pungent odor of rice paddy mud. So different from the black dirt of Iowa. The mud of Nam smells ancient, somehow. Like it's always been there. And I'll never forget the way blood smells, sticky and drying on my hands. I spent a long night that way once. The memory isn't going anywhere.

I remember how the night jungle appears almost dreamlike as pilot of a Cessna buzzes overhead, dropping parachute flares until morning. That artificial sun would flicker and make shadows run through the jungle. It was worse than not being able to see what was out there sometimes. I remember once looking at the man next to me as a flare floated overhead. The shadows around his eyes were so deep that it looked like his eyes were gone. I reached over and touched him on the arm; without looking at me he touched my hand. "I know man. I know." That's what he said. It was a human moment. Two guys a long way from home and scared to death.

God, I loved those guys. I hurt every time one of them died. We all did. Despite our posturing. Despite our desire to stay disconnected, we couldn't help ourselves. I know why Tim O' Brien writes his stories. I know what gives Bruce Weigle the words to create poems so honest I cry at their horrible beauty. It's love. Love for those guys we shared the experience with.

We did our jobs like good soldiers, and we tried our best not to become as hard as our surroundings. You want to know what is frightening. It's a nineteen-year-old-boy who's had a sip of that power over life and death that war gives you. It's a boy who, despite all the things he's been taught, knows that he likes it. It's a nineteen-year-old who's just lost a friend, and is angry and scared and, determined that, "some*@#*s gonna pay". To this day, the thought of that boy can wake me from a sound sleep and leave me staring at the ceiling.

As I write this, I have a picture in front of me. It's of two young men. On their laps are tablets. One is smoking a cigarette. Both stare without expression at the camera. They're writing letters. Staying in touch with places they rather be. Places and people they hope to see again. The picture shares space in a frame with one of my wife. She doesn't mind. She knows she's been included in special company. She knows I'll always love those guys who shared that part of my life, a part she never can. And she understands how I feel about the ones I know are out there yet. The ones who still answer the question, "When were you in Vietnam?"

"Hey, man. I was there just last night."

So was I. How about the rest of you vets-hits home doesn't it!

Share this article with others so they understand why many of today's veteran's behave the way they do be it Vietnam or other conflicts, this is a common thread shared by all.

AUTHORS NOTE:  This statement was sent to me by Mike Paluda who was a friend of Bob Olson and who is quoted in the chapter titled “Warrior.” It is from a soldier who served in the 9th Infantry Division which operated in the Mekong Delta.

Mike stays in touch with a lot of Army guys from the Vietnam War, and I thought that these thoughtful and powerful comments should be passed on.

Rolland Kidder 

PODCAST: CONNECTIONS with EVAN DAWSON

Below is a recording of a live interview with Rolly from April 1st, 2014 on NPR station WXXI am1370 in Rochester, NY.  It's from the CONNECTIONS with EVAN DAWSON radio talk show and in it they discuss the backstory of Kidder's latest book "Backtracking in Brown Water" as well as some of the revelations that were born from the personal research and relationships that he experienced along the way.  This is a good overview of the book with some very interesting commentary.

By the way, Evan's talk show airs Monday - Friday from 12-2pm. You can listen live online at: http://player.nprstations.org/wxxi/#stream/wxxi

Firefight Audio Recording from Vin Te Canal, Vietnam 1969

A U.S. Navy Rockwell OV-10A Bronco of light attack squadron VAL-4 Black Ponies attacking a 

target with a 12.7 cm (5 in) "Zuni" rocket in the Mekong Delta, South Vietnam, ca. 1969/70. 

00:15  /  The first part of this tape is a re-recording of an OV-10 Bronco air strike on the Vinh Te Canal.  I am listening to and recording the events of a previous night when a PBR boat captain had recorded the sounds of this air strike.   He and I are laughing and commenting on what occurred.   At one point, a siren goes off, the signal to stop firing.  Then a Vietnamese sailor yells at a local outpost for them to cease firing.  The outpost had been firing mortars into an area where these Navy strike aircraft (with the call sign “Black Pony”) were flying.   From the tape, you can hear metal falling on the deck of the PBR as the machine guns are fired.   Tracers from PBR machine guns were often used to support air strikes by marking the location of enemy positions.  The sound of the twin engine OV-10’s can be heard as they fly low over the boat on their strafing runs toward the target.

04:15 / On October 26, 1969, I tape-recorded the radio traffic during an enemy attack against our heavy River Assault Group boats.  The position of our PBR was about a mile from the encounter.  We could see the firefight in the distance.  The call sign for the RAG boat commander was “Brass Rail”, and individual boats under attack are designated by various letters of the phonetic alphabet.  U.S. Navy Seawolf helicopters and fixed wing Black Pony attack aircraft can also be heard calling in.  A RAG boat radio sometimes remains keyed in the “on” position and you can hear yelling and firing in the background. The tape accurately describes the chaos, anxiety and fear experienced in a firefight.  

On the Vinh Te Canal, 1969

Rolly (right) talking things through with a mate on the deck of his Patrol Boat, SouthVietnam 1969